Years ago a war rages between Czaron and the King Fredrick. Few tribes have ever even scathed the skin of the Czaron empire. That is until now, you will lead Cameryn the Epic Hero on his journey to defy evil en route to save his love, Deidre(daughter of King Fredrick).
Cameryn awakes from a “battle slumber” to find his small force has been obliterated. He has lost many a friend, and Camryn Must now begin to discover what has become of him by seeking his true fate. The Czaron Realm is still sturdy, although Camryn has fought bravely. Tehlor, Cameryn’s ally and friend, is a good friend and could be a valuable asset. He will be very helpful to Camryn with his civilization of his fathers soldiers (King Fredrick) who are both fast and smart, but need strong leadership (you). Meet up with Tehlor and begin your Quest to fight off Czaron and find your love, Deidre. Be ready to embark on a voyage of wizardry, brut force, and specialized military tactics. Only the best may succeed..if they are lucky.
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PLAYABILITY: The campaign that you posted was rather undone. A rough draft of the game. It is made harder for you that you design together, but the player must never see such things as "stuey ur text goes here." I completed the Quest for Deidre in less than one minute when I found her standing in the woods close to the starting position. But she did not recgnize me for some reason... Many such mistakes cost you points. 3-
BALANCE: Although the player is able to avoid most of the fights, you should not send loads of pikeman onto a 200 HP cavalier. The enemy player does not go beyond King F's walls and is not able to take the castle. 3
CREATIVITY: I have never seen someone use a 'ghost' in a scenario, I felt that was very creative of you. But why? why didn't you go farther and worked the idea to the end?? "They swing their swords aimlessly but can not find him," you say, but for some reason they still hit me and I lose HP! It was such a dissapointment for me. 4
MAP DESIGN: It was good at some places and OK at others. You should get rid of the gaps in the cliffs. 4
STORY / INSTRUCTIONS: I felt it was strange that I was defending the weak city from the enemy. If I would be the king, I would retreat to the well fortified fortress to the East. Or did you intend to emphisize the stupidity of the king? And why does King Frederick's glorious army sleep in the camp while his glorious city is being wrecked? Sometimes instructions were hard to understand too. Only the overall story pulls this section out. 4-
SUGGESTIONS: I suggest you put a looping healing trigger onto Cameryn so that he appears to be undead. Playtest it for about a !month!, and resubmit. Good luck, QFD has excellent potential.
Playability: The game play is underdeveloped and somewhat monotonous. There are many playability issues with this open map design as slight confusion of the game plot is made worse by situations where the intended play seems missing including a victory condition. I tried many times to complete the game and find keys to the missing aspects, and I failed every time. The damage caused by the burning field was poorly implemented game play, but it is a good example of a failed aspect typical of the design. The player has no choice but to sustain damage here if they take that route of exploration. I suggest you give a subtle hint as to what might happen there. Moreover it is made worse by the fact that it doesn't really have a significant consequence, and you can continue on without much trouble. The instructions/hints for the battle of King Frederick's stronghold seemed failed in three attempts, and I had to employ a totally different strategy there before achieving the objective there. For all intents and purposes the battle at King Fredrick's stronghold is where the game ends, and after this all things found through exploring do not advance the game play. Finding the priest's boat does only provided me with the displayed messages there, and I attempted to find a playable aspect there three ways. First time around I met the priest and he helped me meet the objective to find the Shipwright's village. The second attempt was to go there before meeting him, and the third was to go there after defending the stronghold. I finally found Deidre after an exhausting search of the map, and nothing happened. The story premise is fantastic and some of the portrayal was very good, but it wasn't enough to end my frustration with the poor playability. I suggest to fix the situational bugs through play-testing and expand the terrific premise with more game play. 2
The balance of the FF aspects was good providing adequate challenges that were really obstacles along the path of the next objective. There was a bit of monotony about them. I suggest that you continue with your open map design where the Forrest can be used as a way around enemies lying in wait. Only provide a few more challenges, and to make the circumstance of avoiding the enemy as a part of the necessary play to advance on the map. The battle for the stronghold is difficult and exciting at first, but then is ruined by the poor attack of the enemy. I suggest that you enhance the attack here to include a force capable of destroying the King and his castle. Add more triggered enemy attacks and track them through play-testing. Then instruct, and hint at the play required to win. Once you have tracked the play, then you will know how difficult and intuitive the play is. Balance is not created with false hints that lure players into a losing situation that they must restart many times and finally apply totally different tactics. Although I have seen this work in FF situations where the design motivation was to surprise the player, it is totally inappropriate for a B&D element, and especially when the tactics that the player is forced to come up with on their own, are uninteresting, and almost without consequence. 3
A very creative premise/story and the framework for a very good portrayal of it. The open map design fails due to bugs and underdeveloped game play, but I could imagine where exploring might end in a different experience depending on what was explored or encountered first. I suggest enhancing this aspect of your scenario to provide more instructed challenges and also more pitfalls like the burning field that was creative but failed in it's implementation. A very good creative framework that needs more refinement and enhancement of what is there and perhaps some additional aspects. 4
The map is underdeveloped and aside from the battlefield at the games start is mediocre and without intention. Technically the primarily open map was good, only it was without meaning to the game play. The playability issues ruined the experience of the stronghold so I couldn't gauge it's significance technically. I never identified with the other locations as anything other than AoK towns, except for the wizards lair that could have been improved with eye-candy, and again the battlefield at the games start. My suggestion is continue to refine your design and have fun portraying your fantastic story with the objects in the editor. Highlight the areas of play with eye-candy elevation, and terrain blending. Check out some other designs that have ratings of excellence to get some ideas for enhancing your map design. 3
Story and Instructions:
The premise and story are fantastic for a scenario, the framework for the in game continuation and portrayal is there only it's mired in playability issues. The hints that have no meaning have a negative effect on what could be decent instructions. Again the suggestion is to play-test and track and balance the game-play so that you can creatively provide sound instructions, good scouts, and interesting hints for the player. Attention to playability and balance will have a dramatic effect on the story that is the excellent core of this creative design. 3
I really can't recommend playing this while it has it's playability issues. The premise is fantastic and the framework is there for an excellent scenario. I am looking forward to an update.