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ACSC09 - Irish Spring Water
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Author |
File Description |
legoguitars |
Posted on 06/01/09 @ 04:12 PM (updated 06/05/09)
File Details |
Screenshot:
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Version: |
The Conquerors 1.0c |
Many years ago, Milo, an Irish villager lived in the peaceful town of Burley in the mountains. The town experienced many years of peace and prosperity. Its populace was a pleasant one and grew slowly, which was a good thing. The villagers lived relatively relaxing, if hardworking lives. They mined stone in the surrounding mountains to build their magnificent buildings and fished in the nearby river. It got along pretty well with the other neighboring villages in the area.
Witness the event that causes peaceful Milo to exile himself to life in the mountains. Witness the catastrophic result of that event. Witness...
... Irish Spring Water!
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Pages: [1] 2 » Last » | Author | Comments ( All | Comments Only | Reviews Only ) |
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Jatayu (id: Sword_of_STORM)
Official Reviewer |
Posted on 06/04/09 @ 02:08 AM
I'm sorry but this cutscene is really lame.
Starts out okay with above average map design and good music, but then the story just becomes really poor. We have an old monk who fought in a war, horses stampede blablabla and just when you think this is going to lead up to something, the old monk builds a dam in a day, says 'Problem solved' , everyone lives happily everafter, game over. That is such a total let-down I don't think any other story has such an anticlimax. I mean come on, that is one of the worst endings I have ever seen.
Besides that your story's logic is really weird. Ok so the stampede unearthed a spring.. so how did that become a lake ( or whatever ) , and was the river overflowing or something else ( because it didn't look like a river ). Building a dam is the worst possible way to check a flood because first of all, you can't build a dam when a river is in flood, it just isn't possible. Even if it somehow were, this guy builds it OVERNIGHT with like 5 villagers.. lol.. Aok is unrealistic and this could have been ignored if it was leading to something else ( like say a neighbouring king got upset over this and wanted to invade ). But when it's your story's main point it's just stupid.
Play Crasher's Immortal Prey or something to see how suspense and action plays a great role in a cutscene, which yours totally lacks. |
Dtrungle
Official Reviewer |
Posted on 06/04/09 @ 02:57 PM
If this was your first ever cutscene, good try. It pretty much had everything, story, sound, characters, but these elements weren't polished enough. Like Sword says, the story is a bit off. There was one part where 2 different sounds played at once, not sure if you wanted that to happen. Map design could use more touching up. Some scenes were choppy, the flooding and building of the dam seemed bland.
Good try nonetheless. |
legoguitars
File Author |
Posted on 06/04/09 @ 03:57 PM
Thanks for the constructive criticism. I can use advice like that. This is my first cut-scene. I guess maybe it would be better to improve this later on. He didn't build it with five villagers, by the way. The people from the enemy town helped amend their wrongdoings... The story changed a ton from the beginning, which I only had a small idea of what i was going to do. [Edited on 06/04/09 @ 06:47 PM]
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newIdea |
Posted on 06/04/09 @ 04:58 PM
That seems overly-harsh. |
legoguitars
File Author |
Posted on 06/05/09 @ 02:18 PM
Thanks for the invasion suggestion. I'm using it in the improved version! |
Tanneur99
Official Reviewer |
Posted on 06/15/09 @ 07:35 AM
This is sad, you edited for the worse after harsh critiques here. Your edit did not make the story better; instead of replacing the end you shortened the cinematic. The beginning part is still unrealistic, the question from where all that water came to do a river and a lake remains. However, the end of the first version, to repair the damage overnight, is defendable, it depends how many people do the job. I preferred the first version, now you left the player guessing what will happen. Nevertheless, the story is not interesting, no depth, no character description, and no surprises. The overall design suffered from an unrealistic, new, clean road. Places in front of government buildings of the 21. Century look like that but for the middle ages the editor has a good terrain variety. Other places show very good design, like the starting sequence and the place of the shepherd. Do not be dishearten you will do better in your next contest. |
sissi |
Posted on 06/16/09 @ 06:34 AM
Do not be disheartened, it's - as Tanneur says - promising.
Remember also that you're probably the only one to have entered the contest with no submission already prepared, the others have spend months on their submissions, and despite the saying that a cutscene takes a fortnight to design, I don't think so.
In one sense, you've played it fair, for that I congratulate you, and sincerely wish you good luck for the next one ! |
legoguitars
File Author |
Posted on 06/16/09 @ 02:31 PM
Thank you lots sissi! That makes me feel a lot better if you put it that way. It is nice to get some encouragement. Good luck in your own designing! I plan to enter the historical scenario contest as well.
edit: Thanks to you Basse as well. You are one of the first designers that I played work by, in My fort-my empire.[Edited on 06/17/09 @ 10:03 PM]
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Lord Basse
Official Reviewer |
Posted on 06/16/09 @ 03:30 PM
@sissi
... Well, actually I designed my entry in a week, from getting the idea to submitting it :S.
But like sissi and Tanneur said, legoguitars, this project is promising. I personally don't think it's promising as in the way that I want to see a follow-up, but I think you as a designer are very promising, and I hope to see several more projects from you in the future, be it more cut-scenes or playable scenarios :) |
CarthaMod |
Posted on 07/28/09 @ 06:17 AM
I think the invasion scene should be entered and fin tuned and the river should be controlled (the river near me was controlled in a flash flood by building wooden walls) so palisades? then, when the water was chanelled away it made a smaller river which went into a small lake, meanwhile the now smaller river was controllable and i'm sure if they wanted to they could have made a dam, this all happened about 150 years ago so i hope my local history is all right. Could you use that?
I think your gonna be a gr8 cinematics director one day... hehe |
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HGDL v0.8.2 |
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Downloads: | 307 |
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Size: | 5.69 MB |
Added: | 06/01/09 |
Updated: | 06/05/09 |
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